Some days are just too busy and you have to use the past!!!

So I can tell as I just put my babies down to nap, I won't have time to write my thoughts of the day probably with having to go and teach dance later and my husband having to go out of town until late this evening. Who knows though...perhaps I'll blog twice today!!! Busy day already and it's not even 3 o'clock! Anyhow, as you will tell from reading the entry below, this blog was originally written almost 3 years ago. This was my first blog I ever wrote and I posted it on my myspace page which I rarely visit these days. i think I wrote a total of 5 all together before I began this site. Maybe in time I'll post those other ones as well. Hope you enjoy!


Written Tuesday, November 14, 2006



The 13th...and it's not even a Friday
Monday, November13, 2006.
Overcast, dreary, cold.
The 13th, no, not even a Friday, and not even a full moon in sight. Just an eventful day worth writing about for my first blog entry. Uncanny, though it is... Tired beyond any stretch of the imagination, I feel I have to share this tale. Today, I went from being the recipient of one lone parking ticket in college (which naturally, I appealed and lost, but I got a cool ODU parking shirt out of the deal...hmmm...) to the owner of a fresh, hot off the rack speeding ticket. I've labeled myself police catnip. I'm still confused as to how and why this really happened to me. And not because I think I'm above the law, for many of you know better. Everyone I've bombarded with this sad tale has welcomed me to the club. Is this a fraternity or brotherhood of sorts that is to enrich my life and social status? I'm not sure I like the initiation, let alone, having the "honor" of being an exclusive new member. It's not like a characteristically faded battle wound or death defying scar you can show as your badge of survival. My existence has been tested, possibly ruined today. I know, I know. It's not Armageddon, though you'd think it so, by the toll it has taken on me. Let me take your time to further explain this uncanny event in this hereto short story of mine. I mean novel.
Let's work backwards.
Driving along Highway 168, I apparently had a false sense of security. When I least expected for even the children to cry, BAM BITCH! (homage to you, Sarah) Blue lights literally surface out of nowhere. First thought, awww...someone must be hurt. I think this reasoning is the result of being around funeral homes my entire life. Then, the lights continue to flicker behind me. I look over to my girlfriend, Amy, and say nonchalantly, "I think I'm getting pulled over." Keep in mind, we took our children shopping in Virginia today and this being my first time driving someone else's child around other than my niece.
On with the story. I'm in what I believe to be a 55 mph zone. Wait, it is a 55 mph zone and the cruise control is set for 54 mph! Yes, I'm a cautious driver...so I thought until this afternoon. Cars are seriously zipping past me. Amy replies, "Maybe you have a tail light out." Yeah, that's got to be it, I think. Still, I could feel the tightening in my chest cavity. I was becoming claustrophobic within my very car. I felt like a caged bird lusting to fly or a parched plant craving thirst. Well, the arrogant SOB of a cop (and not just because he DID give me a ticket, though that intensifies my anger outburst) informs me that we had passed a school zone. He even goes on to explain that I was the car he "chose" to pull over. Again, like this is some sort of honor. First, no lights indicated that school was ending. I swear. Or either Amy and I both need to have our tunnel vision checked out. I'm a mother for crying out loud! I wouldn't jeopardize children's lives, let alone my own precious offspring!
Continuing. The deputy, (who severely lacked personality) wasn't polite--at all! My guess is that he is an ingenue cop throwing his weight (and he was rotund) around. I feel he chose to pull us over for two reasons. One, we were going SLOWER than the rest of the pack, and two, he saw two young females he thought he'd hassell for a bit. Too bad for us at that instance we had children in the rear. (For your information, they were being quite good for a 2 1/2 and 1 year old throughout this ordeal) I guess he felt compelled to be a jerk rather than hit on mothers. Yes, I'm insinuating this, but who knows. It's no secret that cops like coffee, donuts, authority, and ATTENTION. (I'm kidding people. Cops rightly deserve the praise they receive for their bravery and valor.) Though, Deputy Sutton, as his name would appear, was just inhuman! He must have been having a bad day. Cue up Daniel Powter's hit song here. Of course the deputy decided to take his time writing me up. I held myself together until he drove off and then...the tears flowed! It takes a lot to bring me to tears. For this, I give him due credit. As I stared at my new, crisp speeding ticket, a rush of adrenaline, of shame, of guilt, anger, and confusion set in. Apparently, I had endangered all of the lives in the car, other drivers on the highway, and innocent school children. Aghhh. Indeed, I'm no longer the model mother some believed me to be. For all I know, they'll make Bert a ward of the state, take my license and ship me off to jail in my designer jeans and unpressed shirt. However, as I write this, I'm beginning to push the incident into the cerebellum part of the brain, rather than the frontal lobe.
My mind is racing. Yeah, racing. I love NASCAR. I love Dale Jr. Maybe I can qualify for the Busch series. Yeah, I know, that's a stretch. Perhaps the Craftmans Truck Series. No. That's a feat in and of itself. 54 mph hardly would constitute awarding me that priviledge. I would imagine a speed limit of 54 mph is lame in a racecar driver's eyes. Probably even in Sutton's. So, I'm picking up the pieces and moving forward. I did call my brothers, since Mom and Dad are traveling throughout unknown parts of Amish country. Like always, they instantly made me feel better and loved! Older brothers are indeed the best! David thought someone had died (what is it with my family?) since I was so hysterical. He "made a phone call" and told me to rest my head tonight knowing it would get better. (Sadly, but helpful for me this time, it helps to know people sometimes. And no, this doesn't mean I'll completely get out of it.) J.J. on the other hand, resisted probably his usual urge to pick on me, though in due time people, it'll happen! Trust me! He still likes to bring up at family gatherings that I passed out drunk at a bar and had to be taken to the hospital via ambulance for fear of my existing heart problems. I could literally feel J.J.'s arms around me though, as he told me over the phone, not to worry. He knows what it's like to get MUCH worse. "It's not the end of the world," he says. On a side note, both brothers have called tonight to check on their "poochie." Did I mention that I LOVE my brothers? Let me also just continue by adding that the evening progressed with me starting my monthly feminine cycle (Rob is praising his "impeccable" timing skills in that I'm not preggers again, though we all know that synthetic birth control is almost 100% effective it taken correctly), Bert is teething (you parents understand how trying this is and feel my pain. We'll face him getting up even earlier than normal in a few hours), my cat got stuck behind the washing machine and she NEVER even goes in the laundry room, and Jackson, our beloved boxer, ate too much lawn tonight. (This meaning, I just finished wiping up vomit. Thank goodness for hardwood floors.) Lastly, after having spent my first night alone with Bert last evening, Rob returns home with a full load worth of dirty clothes from his quick trip to NY, where inevitably, the Giants unfortunately lost on home territory.
But, no worries! I'm not bitter. No. It takes more than that Mr. Sutton! I'm healthy, happy and blessed. Just the good deputy should keep his distance from me, for I fear the wrath of Whitney COULD rear it's ugly head with a vengenance. My Chardonnay is gone now, the house has stopped stirring, and I'm off to bed to seek solace with my National Enquirer that came in the mail today. I hope I can drift off to a titalating Britney Spears story announcing her huge comeback and continue with what I hope to include nothing except sweet dreams. My interrupted 8 hours of sleep is about to begin.
Tomorrow IS another day...